Zionist is the New Faggot

Sometimes The Haters Really Do Have a Point

Some words never get fully reclaimed (cc Flickr Nicole Salow)

There are only three things that every gay man has in common:

We’ve fallen in love with a boy that couldn’t love us back.
We’ve had to find the words to tell someone who we really are.
We’ve had a pickup truck drive by and yell “faggot” at us.

As a gay man of a certain age, I’ve lived through several lifetimes of social acceptance for our people. I remember when “known homosexual” was printed in bold type in the police blotter as gay men were arrested and fired from their jobs. When it was written between the lines — “survived by his parents, survived by his longtime companion” — as obituary after obituary crowded those same pages. When DOMA became Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell became Prop 8, became Obergefell became Mayor Pete, became book bans, and bathroom bans and transition bans and drag queen story hour.

All along, I’ve still been that same queer…before I had the words to say it.

To come out as a gay person though, you need to master the skill of owning your “otherness”; it is generally not passed down to you by your parents. You have to decide on the words, the timing and their personal importance. Everyone’s journey is different, but if we want to live openly as ourselves, we…